I want to be closer.
I want to be near you.
Touching your hot skin
with my fingertips.
Tracing your lips
with the tip
of my tongue.
I want to look into your eyes
see your temperature rise,
feel the sweat on your chest
when I'm near you.

---

I wish we were closer.
I want to be dear to you.
I want to hear you.
Murmur your thoughts
and your wants
in my ear.
I want to feel you.
When your voice trembles
and your breath escapes
and the words
let me know
you want to be closer.

---

The rusted bars of
this rigid cage
hold strong.
Steely cutting cold,
bitter to the bone.

---

I long for home.
I am alone.

---

Solid flesh of a man
but still a boy;
fragile, young, foolish child.

---

I brought this on myself.
Bound and shackled.
Consequences of crusades
franticly fought
on darkened roads.

---

I have lost -
blood, balance and brothers.
No soldiers stand
beside me now.

---

I am alone.
I long for home.

---

Thank you
for knowing me,
all of me,
and loving me anyway.

---

Thank you for listening
to my heart.
For understanding
my words
and for remembering
my past.

---

Thank you
for making me believe
in friendship, honesty,
and trust.

---

For reminding me
that I am
not all alone.
And for respecting me,
even when we don't agree.

---

And mostly,
thank you
for letting me love you
in return.

---

You have promised me
nothing.
No vows spoken in my name;
no gentle words whispered
for me alone.

---

Yet, the spell has been cast,
the idea set in motion,
the desire sparked
inside of me
with one soft
breath;
one small touch.

---

You have promised me
nothing.
And still, I hope
for everything.

---

Your face,
I want to scream,
rip, claw and gouge.

---

I hate you:
barrier, obstacle,
manipulator,
bitch.

---

Reminded of you,
I cry out:
agony,
envy,
jealousy.

---

Smile, I do,
in your face.
I want to scream.

---

do you think that my
feelings of inadequacy
would drain away
if I slit the skin that
holds them in?

---

would they trickle,
trail away
onto the
pure white pristine
tiles?

---

would they puddle at my feet,
blurred in my vision as I fall...
fall... fall...
as my thoughts fall away?

---

Girlfriend.
Black and blue,
raw ugly pain,
like eating crushed glass.
He cries;
sobbing, panting.
She suffers with him.
Hard as it is,
she does not ask,
but rocks him easily
as a mother might.

---

---

You will ache for me
on still winter mornings
when the shadows whisper
love songs to the fading night.

---

You will long for me
at the end of a perfect day
when the summer winds
chant my name
and evening begins
to eat the golden light.

---

And you will wait for me,
long after I have forgotten,
standing in the driving rain
while darkness dances past --
slowly, slowly --
saddened by your empty eyes.

---

And you will know inside
that the choices you have made
will eat at you
until the day you die.

---

You are in my head again.
Thoughts of you,
stalking me again.
I find myself next to you,
and then,
you are in my head again.

---

In my mind
your face I see
repeatedly;
my lust for you
is plaguing me.
You are in my head again.

---

You kissed my lips and then
I fell in love again.
I want you more than when
we were simply friends.
You are in my head again.

To your left is a small sample of my writing. I write for fun because I enjoy playing with words and sounds and sometimes it helps me feel better about things that are bothering me. Sometimes I write about things in my life and sometimes I write about abstract feelings or about other peoples' lives. If you know me and think that I've written about you, just ask me.

---

I've been told that I have a talent for writing and have had some of my poems published in my college literary magazine. With that in mind, I hold the copyright to these words. Please don't reproduce them or claim them as your own.

"Warm sun, feed me up and I'm leery loaded up
Loathing for a change
And I slip some boil away "
-Bush, Swallowed